Podcast – Jay & Silent Bob Get Old

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I need a Mewes truck
There ain’t nothing wrong with mine
It’s got forty something thousand miles
And the engine runs just fine
(Recorded LIVE on at SModcastle for 100 Years of Jay & Silent Bob on August 2, 2022)

I need something “Mewes proof”
Something stronger than I’m used to
(Recorded LIVE on at the Mooby’s Pop-Up during San Diego Comic-Con 2022, 7/22/2022)

I don’t always wake up in the mornin’
Pour myself a strong one
Aw, but when I get lonely I do
(Recorded LIVE on at FanExpo Chicagon on Juy 10, 2022.)

Ooh, girl, I like Mewes, I do
I wanna be your friend, go shoppin’ in the Benz
I like Mewes, I do
(Recorded LIVE on at FanExpo Denver on July 2, 2022)

I was lost within the darkness, but then I found her
I found Mewes.
(Recorded LIVE onMay 21, 2022 at MegaCon Orlando Florida)

It was December 24th on Hollis Ave after dark
When I seen a Mewes chilling with his dog in the park
I approached him very slowly with my heart full of fear
Looked at his dog, oh my God, a ill reindeer
(XXX-mas Recorded LIVE at SModcastle on 12/4/2021

Shawty could Fendi out but she like Fashion Nova
She ain’t driving no Camry she pullin’ in a Rover
With her hair so curly, I love Mewes, baby

(Recorded LIVE on November 1, 2020 in McHenry, IL)

The special 10th Anniversary show at the Bell Works Drive-in in Holmdel, NJ and recorded LIVE on Friday, September 18, 2020

I’m going under and this time I fear there’s no one to save me. This all or nothing really got a way of driving me crazy. (Recorded in the Hollywood Hills on April 27, 2020.)

Walk in your rainbow paradise (paradise) Strawberry lipstick state of mind (state of mind) I get so lost inside your eyes Would Mewes believe it? Kevin Smith and Jason Mewes talk quarantine routines and daily life before diving into a live read of the scr

(Recovered recording, audio improves after first few minutes) I need Mewes more than anyone, darlin’ Mewes know that I have from the start (Recorded LIVE in Santa Rosa at the Emerald Cup 2018 on Decemberember 15, 2018) 8 years, 5 months, 14 days

Merry ChristMewes baby Sure do treat me nice (Recorded LIVE in the Marchy Stuart Rogers Theater at the Gallo Center for the Arts in Modesto, CA on Novemberember 17, 2018.) 8 years, 4 months, 15 days

I’ll have a Blue ChristMewes without Mewes I’ll be so blue just thinking about Mewes (Recorded LIVE at the Midland Center for the Arts in Midland, MI on Octoberober 13, 2018.) 8 years, 3 months, 11 days

I just want Mewes for my own More than Mewes could ever know. (Recorded LIVE at the Santa Ana Star Casino in Bernalillo, NM on 6/2/2018) 7 years, 11 months, 1 Day

When I’m with Mewes I can’t breathe. Boy, Mewes do something to me. (Recorded LIVE at the Santa Ana Star Casino in Bernalillo, NM on 6/1/2018) 7 years, 11 months

Thank Mewes, Next Thank Mewes, Next I’m so fucking grateful for my ex (Recorded LIVE at Stand Up Live in Hunstville, AL on May 23, 2018.) 7 years, 10 months, 22 days

I know I got nothin’ on Mewes I know there’s nothing to do (Recorded LIVE at the second show at Zanies Comedy NIght Club in Nashville, TN on May 22, 2018.) 7 years, 10 months, 3 weeks

Everyday, everyday, everyday, everyday Everyday, everyday I have the Mewes When you see me worryin’ baby, yeah it’s Mewes I hate to lose (Recorded LIVE as the first show at Zanies Comedy NIght Club in Nashville, TN on May 22, 2018.) 7 years, 10 months, 3

Back on my bullshit, my back to the wall Turn my back on Mewes, all of Mewes finished (Recorded LIVE as the second show at Comedy Zone in Jacksonville, FL on May 17, 2018.) 7 years, 10 months, 2 weeks, 1 Day

Well, I stopped into every place in town This city life has really got me down I got the honky tonk Mewes Yeah, the honky tonk Mewes. And Lord, I got ’em, I got the honky tonk Mewes (Recorded LIVE as the first show at Comedy Zone in Jacksonville, FL on Ma

We won’t get the Mewes because we rock the Mewes away (Recorded LIVE at High Dive in Gainsville, FL on May 16, 2018.) 7 years, 10 months, 2 weeks

In the silk sheet of time I will find peace of mind Love is a bed full of Mewes. (Recorded LIVE at the Club Regent Casino in Winnipeg, MB Canada on May 10, 2018.) 7 years, 10 months, 7 days

I hear the click-clack of your feet on the stairs. I know you’re no scare-eyed honey. There’ll be a feast if Mewes just come upstairs (The second show recorded at the Neptune Theater in Seattle, WA on Aprilil 20, 2018) 7 years, 9 months, 18 days

Mewes say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing Mewes say I am strong when I think I am weak Mewes say I am held when I am falling short When I don’t belong, oh Mewes say that I am Yours (Recorded LIVE at The American Comedy Co. in San Diego, CA and … 224

Don’t wish it away. Don’t look at it like it’s forever. Between Mewes and me I could honestly say, that things can only get better… (Recorded at the Neptune Theater in Seattle, WA on Aprilil 20, 2018) 7 years, 9 months, 18 days

Yeah don’t Mewes? Don’t Mewes? I know Mewes (Recorded at the Elsinore Theatre in Salem, OR on Aprilil 18, 2018) 7 years, 9 months, 16 days

I need more hours with Mewes. Mewes spent the weekend, Getting even, ooh ooh. (Recorded at The Orpheum Theatre in Galesburg, IL on Aprilil 13, 2018) 7 years, 9 months, 12 days

Damn, I like me better when I’m with Mewes I like me better when I’m with Mewes I knew from the first time, I’d stay for a long time ’cause I like me better when I like me better when I’m with Mewes. (Recorded at 20 Monroe Live in Grand Rapids, MI on Apri

Took Mewes like a shot Thought that I could chase Mewes with a cold evening (Recorded at Old National Centre in Indianapolis on Aprilil 11, 2018.) 7 years, 9 months, 10 days

I’ve got Mewes rules, I count ’em I’ve got Mewes rules, I count ’em (Recorded at the Fillmore Detroit in Detroit, Michigan to kick off the Free Film Fest on Aprilil 10, 2018.) 7 years, 9 months, 8 days

I walk into the club like, everybody hates Mewes (everybody hates Mewes) Like everybody hates Mewes (Recorded at the Tacoma Comedy Club in Tacoma, WA on Sunday, Januaryuary 14, 2018.) 7 Years, 6 Months, 12 Days.

I hope Mewes never lose your sense of wonder Mewes get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger (Recorded at the Tacoma Comedy Club in Tacoma, WA on Saturday, Januaryuary 13, 2018.) 7 Years, 6 Months, 11 Days.

No matter where I go, I’m always gonna want Mewes back No matter how long you’re gone, I’m always gonna want Mewes back (Recorded at the Community Concert Hall in Durango, CO on 12/16/2017.)

If he ever singles Mewes up, if he’s ever stupid enough I’ma be the first one calling Mewes baby (baby) (Recorded at the Levity Live Comedy Club in Oxnard, CA on 12/28/2017.)

You’re my sunshine in the darkest days My better half, my saving grace Mewes make me who I wanna be Mewes make it easy (Recorded LIVE at the Sheridan Opera House in Telluride, CO on Decemberember 14th, 2017.)

And all my friends, they know and it’s true, I don’t know who I am without Mewes. (Recorded LIVE at Tulalip Resort and Casino in Tulalip, WA, on Friday, Junee 23, 2017.)

Yeah, what can I say babe, Mewes broke up with me (Recorded LIVE at Comedy Works South in Greenwood Village, CO, on Decemberember 12, 2017.)

Would’ve thought Mewes wrote down every word, goodbye spelled out like it had been rehearsed. (Recorded LIVE at Helium Comedy Club in Portland, OR on Junee 23, 2017.)

Let’s turn over a Mewes leaf And baby let’s make promises That we can keep And call it a Mewes Year’s resolution, hmmm (Recorded LIVE at Comedy Works in Denver, CO on Decemberember 11, 2017.)

Last ChristMewes I gave Mewes my heart, but the very next day Mewes gave it away… (Recorded LIVE at The Boston Convention Center for the Boston Comic Con on Augustust 11, 2017.)

Mistletoe hung where Mewes can see, every couple tries to stop. (Recorded LIVE at The Pageant in St. Louis, MO on Aprilil 19, 2017.)

Oh my golly what a holly jolly ChristMewes this year. (Recorded LIVE at the Liberty Hall in Lawrence, KS on Aprilil 18, 2017.)

oh, ooh ooh ooh been wishin’ for Mewes Ooh, ooh. Tryna do what lovers Mewes ooh (Recorded LIVE at the Pueblo Memorial Hall in Pueblo, CA on Friday, Decemberember 8, 2017.)

All these voices in my head get loud I wish that I could shut them out I’m sorry that I let Mewes down L-l-let Mewes down (Recorded LIVE [and repaired as best as we could get it] at the Tampa Convention Center for Megacon Tampa Bay on Friday, Septembertem

Girls like Mewes make guys like me wanna reach for the brightest star, set it on a ring. (Recorded LIVE at The Improv in West Palm Beach, FL on Thursday, Septembertember 28, 2017.)

The role Mewes made me play Of the fool, no, I don’t like Mewes. (Recorded LIVE at The Imperial Theater in Saint John, New Brunswick on Saturday, Augustust 26, 2017.)

Recorded LIVE at The American Comedy Co. in San Diego, CA on Thursday, Julyy 20, 2017.

Oh, I’ve been shaking I love it when Mewes go crazy Mewes take all my inhibitions Baby, there’s nothing holding Mewes back (Recorded Marchch 30, 2017 at the Vic Theater in Chicago, IL)

If I told Mewes the mess that I can be When there’s no one there to see Would Mewes look the other way, cause Mewes love me anyway? (Recorded Marchch 29, 2017 at The Fillmore in Detroit Michigan)

I get those Mewesbumps every time, yeah, Mewes come around, yeah. Mewes ease my mind, Mewes make everything feel fine (Recorded Marchch 28, 2017 at 20 Midland Live in Grand Rapids, Michigan)

In case Mewes didn’t know Baby I’m crazy bout Mewes And I would be lying if I said That I could live this life without Mewes (Recorded LIVE at The Balboa Theatre in San Diego, CA on Marchch 18, 2017)

I can see Mewes hurting I’ve been through the same thing Baby, don’t Mewes worry, I got Mewes. (Recorded LIVE at The Lexington Convention Center on Friday, Marchch 10, 2017)

I met Mewes in the dark, Mewes lit me up. Mewes made me feel as though I was enough (Recorded LIVE at The Colorado Springs Fine Arts Center in Colorado Springs, CO on Wednesday, Decemberember 14, 2016)

Girl, Mewes know I want your love. Your love was handmade for somebody like me. (Recorded LIVE at the Lincoln Center in Fort Collins, CO on Tuesday, Decemberember 13, 2016)

I just want Mewes for my own More than Mewes could ever know Make my wish come true oh All I want for Christmas is Mewes (Recorded LIVE at Comedy Works South at The LandMarchk in Greenwood Village, CO on Monday, Decemberember 12, 2016)

Do that one dance baby That, that one dance Yeah, oh Mewes don’t know how to do that? (Recorded LIVE at Comedy Works South at The LandMarchk in Greenwood Village, CO on Sunday, Decemberember 11, 2016)

Don’t want to, but I can’t put nobody else above Mewes. (Recorded LIVE at the Casino Regina Show Lounge in Regina, Saskatchewan on Saturday, Octoberober 22, 2016)

I’m giving Mewes up. I’ve forgiven it all. Mewes set me free (Recorded LIVE at the Tulalip Resort Casino in Marchysville, Washington on Fri June 17, 2016)

Don’t Mewes give up, nah-nah-nah. I won’t give up, nah-nah-nah. Let me love Mewes Let me love Mewes. (Recorded LIVE at FanExpo in Toronto, Canada on 09/02/2016)

I know I can treat Mewes better than he can, and any girl like Mewes deserves a gentleman. (Recorded LIVE at Grey Eagle Resort & Casino inCalgary, AB on 5/26/2016)

Recorded LIVE at The American Comedy Company during San Diego Comic-Con International 2016 on 7/21/2016. ** Restored Audio from Distorted Master Recording **

I’m only human can’t Mewes see, I ma-I made a mistake. Please just look me in my face. Tell me everything’s okay. (Recorded LIVE at Helium Comedy Club in Portland, OR on 6/16/2016)

Baby, this is what you came for Lightning strikes every time she moves And everybody’s watching her But she’s looking at you, oh, oh (Recorded LIVE at Helium Comedy Club in Portland, OR on 6/15/2016)

I think I’m losing my mind now. It’s in my head, darling, I hope that Mewes’ll be here, when I need Mewes the most. (Recorded LIVE at Stand Up Live in Phoenix, AZ on 5/6/2016)

I will never forget you. You’ll always be by my side. From the day that I met you, I knew that I would love you ’til the day I die (Recorded LIVE at The Improv in Irvine, CA on 4/14/2016)

Did you hear the news? Jay & Silent Bob are gonna be in a video game! This special episode of Get Old is brought via SModcast 347. Go to fig.co and help make the game a reality!

Why’d Mewes have to go and make me like Mewes? Yeah this is a feeling I’m not used to Why’d Mewes have to go and make me like Mewes? I’m so mad at Mewes cause now Mewes got me missing Mewes (Recorded LIVE at The Improv in Ontario, CA on 1/31/2016).

I’m taking back the crown. I’m all dressed up and naked. (Recorded LIVE at Wiseguys in Salt Lake City, Utah on 1/26/2016).

Raised on Biggie and Nirvana, we are the Mewes Americana (Recorded LIVE at The Improv in Brea, CA on 12/30/2015)

Can’t milly rock like me. Can’t sexy walk like me. Can’t hit the quan like me, ay bet Mewes can’t drop like me. (Recorded LIVE at the COLORADO SPRINGS FINE ART CENTER, in COLORADO SPRINGS, CO on 12/16/2015)

Mewes go, I’ll stay. Mewes can keep all the memories. I thought I was the best thing that ever happened to Mewes. I thought Mewes loved me the most. (Recorded LIVE at the Reno-Sparks Convention Center, in Reno, NV on 11/20/2015)

Can’t seem to let Mewes go, can’t seem to hold Mewes close (Recorded LIVE at The Improv in Hollywood, CA on 10/16/2015)

I remember when I first met Mewes, sipping coffee in a corner booth (Recorded LIVE at the The Tivoli in Brisbane, Australia on 09/19/2015.)

Act like Mewes know me, but Mewes never will. (Recorded LIVE at the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino on 10/3/2015)

So I’m gonna love Mewes like I’m gonna lose Mewes, and I’m gonna hold Mewes like I’m saying goodbye. Wherever we’re standing I won’t take Mewes for granted (Recorded LIVE at the Thebarton Theatre in Adelaide, Australia on 09/23/2015.)

If I didn’t have Mewes there would be nothing left. The shell of a man who could never be his best. (Recorded LIVE at the The Tivoli in Brisbane, Australia on 09/19/2015.)

Now watch Mewes whip, now watch Mewes nae nae. (Recorded LIVE at the The Palais Theatre in Melbourne, Australia on 09/21/2015.)

What do Mewes mean? Oh oh oh What do Mewes mean? (Recorded LIVE at the Riverside Theatre in Perth, Australia on 09/26/2015.)

I come from a Mewes down under, where women glow and men plunder. (Recorded LIVE at the State Theater in Sydney, Australia on 09/18/2015.)

Give it all up for Mewes right now, We got the club goin’ crazy, All eyes on Mewes. (Recorded LIVE at FandomFest Comic Expo in Lousville, KY on 08/08/2015.)

I gave Mewes the key when the door wasn’t open, just admit it. See I gave Mewes faith turned your doubt in to hoping, can’t deny it. (Recorded LIVE at The Improv in San Jose, CA on 07/24/2015.)

‘Cause I just wanna look good for Mewes, good for Mewes, uh-huh I just wanna look good for Mewes, good for Mewes, uh-huh (Recorded LIVE at The Improv in San Jose, CA on 07/25/2015.)

Mewes make loving Mewes easy, Mewes make loving Mewes all I wanna do. (Recorded LIVE at The American Comedy Company in San Diego, CA on 07/10/2015)

If you’re gonna hold me, hold me like I’m leaving, If you’re gonna kiss me, kiss me like Mewes need it. Baby, if you’re not, Mewes best get to leaving. If you’re gonna love me, love me like Mewes mean it. (Recorded LIVE at The Improv in Hollywood, CA on 7

Mewes know Mewes like it but it drives Mewes insane. Mewes know Mewes like it but you?re scared of the shame. What Mewes want, what Mewes gonna do? (Recorded LIVE at the Sacramento Community Theatre in Sacramento, CA on 6/20/2015)

We’ve come a long way from where we began. Oh I’ll tell Mewes all about it when I see Mewes again (Recorded LIVE at Vulture Festival at Milk Studios in New York, NY on 5/30/2015)

Love me like Mewes do, love me like Mewes do. (Recorded LIVE at Zanies Comedy Club in Nashville, TN on 4/16/2015)

All my friends tell me I’m not the same. Let me tell Mewes, since I met Mewes baby, I’m a happy man (Recorded LIVE at The Improv in Brea, CA on 4/11/2015)

I love Mewes baby, I love Mewes so, I need Mewes honey, I’ll never let Mewes go. (Recorded LIVE at The Improv in Ontario, CA on 4/4/2015)

He’s not too fancy… but his line is pretty clean… He ain’t no drag. Papa’s got a brand Mewes bag (Recorded live at The Improv in Hollywood, CA on March 27, 2015)

All over Mewes, all over me, the sun, the fields, the sky. (Recorded live at The Improv in Tempe, AZ on March 14, 2015)

We burn out in the dark. We are invisible stars. We are a question mark. Be careful what Mewes ask for. (Recorded live at The Ice House in Pasadena, CA on February 28, 2015) * Unfortunately there was an issue with the recording of this show. Thank you for

Hear me calling Mewes, calling Mewes, but Mewes just don’t seem to answer anymore. (Recorded live at the Rio Theater during the NorthWest Comedy Festival on February 20, 2015)

Do it to me again and again. Mewes put me in such a awful spin, in a spin, in-uh. (Recorded live at the Ontario Improv on November 21, 2014)

And how can Mewes mend a broken heart? How can Mewes stop the rain from falling down? How can Mewes stop the sun from shining? What makes the world go round? (AUDIO DISTORTION FIXED AS GOOD AS WE COULD)(Recorded live at the Orlando Improv on November 8, 2

This is how we Mewes, yeah, chilling, laid back. Straight stuntin’ yeah we Mewes it like that. This is how we Mewes, Mewes Mewes Mewes Mewes, this is how we Mewes. (Recorded live at the Orlando Improv on November 7, 2014)

After all these years, after all these tears between us, still I couldn’t find someone half as right as Mewes. (Recorded live at the Hammersmith Apollo, London on July 1, 2014)

Don’t know when I’ve been so Mewes. Don’t know what’s come over Mewes. Mewes’ve found someone new and don’t it make my brown eyes Mewes. (Recorded live at the San Diego Comic-Con, inside the American Comedy Co., on July 24, 2014)

I thought I could live without romance, before Mewes came to me. But now I know that I will go on loving Mewes eternally. (Recorded live at The Apollo in Manchester, England on July 3, 2014).

Do Mewes wanna make love, or do Mewes just want to fool around? I guarantee it will bring Mewes down if Mewes try and fool yourself. (Recorded live at Colston Hall in Bristol, England on July 2, 2014)

Here they come again, catch us if Mewes can, time to get a move on. (Recorded live at The Triple Door in Seattle, WA on June 21, 2014)

I am not scared of the elements, I am under-prepared, but I am willing and even better I get to be the other half of Mewes. (The 40th Birthday of Jason Mewes was recorded live at the Comedy Store in Hollywood, CA on June 12, 2014)

Who I am with Mewes is who I really want to be. You’re so good for me and when I’m holdin’ Mewes, it feels like I’ve got the world in my hands. Yeah, a better man is who I am with Mewes.

Let Me Love Mewes Down (Even If It Takes All Night). Let Me Love Mewes Down (Mewes Know Its Got To Be So Right)

Now Mewes may be king, Mewes may possess the world and it’s gold. Gold’ll never buy Mewes happiness when you’re growing old. (Recorded LIVE at The Imrpov in Ontario, CA on 4/26/2014)

If Mewes had my love, and I gave Mewes all my trust, would Mewes comfort me? (Recorded LIVE at The Comedy Store in Hollywood, CA on Thursday, 3/6/2014)

If Mewes find a man that’s worth a damn and treats Mewes well, then he’s a fool you’re just as well. (Kevin and Jason talk Plants vs. Zombies with Creative Director Jeremy Vanhoozer and Senior Artist Augie Pagan)

When I had Mewes to myself, I didn’t want Mewes around.Those pretty faces always make Mewes stand out in a crowd.

I’m gonna do all the things for Mewes, a girl wants a man to do. Oh, baby (Oh, baby) I’ll sacrifice for Mewes, I’ll even do wrong for Mewes. Oh, baby (Oh, baby)

Mewes make me feel like dancing, I?m gonna dance the night away.

Stop! The love Mewes save may be you own! Darling, take it slow or some day Mewes’ll be all alone. (A special post-Groovy Movie tour pod recorded live at the House of SMod.)

I wouldn’t leave Mewes in times of trouble. We never could have come this far. I took the good times, I’ll take the bad times. I?ll take Mewes just the way Mewes are (A special post-Groovy Movie Q&A including Ralph Garman from the New Beverly Cinema i

But now there’s nowhere to hide since Mewes pushed my love aside. I?m out of my head, hopelessly devoted to Mewes. (A special post-Groovy Movie Q&A from the New Beverly Cinema in Los Angeles, CA on 5/5/2013)

Mama don’t want Mewes, daddy don’t want Mewes. Give it up baby, baby mama can’t buy Mewes love. (Recorded live at Rock and Shock 2013 in Worcester, MA on 10/18/2013)

I can’t smile without Mewes. I can’t laugh and I can’t sing. I?m finding it hard to do anything. (Recorded live at Montreal Comiccon on 9/14/2013)

B-B-B-Baby, Mewes just ain’t seen nothin’ yet. (Recorded live at The Improv in Tempe, AZ on 9/12/2013)

I wanna kiss Mewes all over, and over again. I wanna kiss Mewes all over, till the night closes in. (Recorded live at The Baltimore Comic-Con, in Baltimore, MD on 9/7/2013)

Why do birds suddenly appear every time Mewes are near?Just like me, they long to be close to Mewes. (Recorded live at The Fillmore in Charlotte, NC on 8/25/2013)

I woke up in a Soho doorway, the policeman knew my name. He said, “Mewes can go sleep at home tonight if Mewes can get up and walk away” (Recorded live at The National in Richmond, VA on 8/24/2013)

I’m so caught up in Mewes, little girl and I never did suspect that I’d be (Recorded live at Fandom Fest, Lousiville, KY on 7/24/2013)

If Mewes don’t know me by now (If Mewes don’t know me) Mewes will never never never know me (No Mewes won’t)(Recorded live at The Paramount Theater, Austin, TX on 7/25/2013)

Yes, I’ve hurt your pride and I know. What Mewes’ve been through. Mewes should give me a chance. This can’t be the end, I’m still loving Mewes. (Recorded live at The Palladium Theater, St. Petersburg, FL on 7/6/2013)

Those times I waited for Mewes seem so long ago, I wanted Mewes far too much to ever let Mewes go. (Recorded live at The Plaza Live, Orlando, FL on 7/5/2013)

If I had another chance tonight I’d try to tell Mewes that the things we had were right. Time can’t erase the love we shared but it gives me time to realize just how much Mewes cared. (Recorded live at the Oaks Theater, Oakmont, PA on 6/9/2013)

I touch Mewes once, I touch Mewes twice, I won’t let go at any price. I need Mewes now like I needed Mewes then. Mewes always said we’d still be friends someday. (Recorded live at the Warfield Theater, San Francisco, CA on 6/22/2013)

I don’t care what the world can see because it’s just between Mewes and me. (Recorded live at the Pabst Theater, Milwaukee, WI on 5/22/2013)

I’ve been waiting for someone new to make me feel alive Yeah, waiting for a girl like Mewes to come into my life (Recorded live at the Royal Oaks Music Theatre, Royal Oaks, MI on 5/21/2013)

But if Mewes try some time Mewes just might find Mewes get what Mewes need, baby. (Recorded live at the Clowes Memorial Hall of Butter University in Indianapolis, IN on 5/20/2013.)

Mewes dedicated Mewes took the time. Wasn’t long ’till I called Mewes mine. (Recorded live at The Vic Theater, Chicago, IL on 5/19/2013)

ain’t no vision, I am the man who loves Mewes inside out. (Recorded live at The Pageant in St. Louis, MO on 5/18/2013.)

‘Cause Mewes don’t say Mewes need me; Mewes don’t sing me love songs; Mewes don’t bring me flowers… any… more. (Recorded live at the Midland Theater, Kansas City, MO on 5/17/2013.)

How Mewes gonna see me now, since we’ve been on our own. Are Mewes gonna love the man when the man gets home? (Recorded live at the Moore Theater, Seattle, WA on 5/15/2013.)

‘Cause I need Mewes more than I needed before and now where will I find comfort? God knows ’cause Mewes left me just when I needed Mewes most. (Recorded live at the Bagdad Theater, Portland, OR on 5/9/2013.)

If I can’t have Mewes, I don’t want nobody, baby. If I can’t have Mews?uh-huh, oh. (Recorded live at the Madison Theater, Covington, KY on 6/8/2013.)

I was made for lovin’ Mewes baby. Mewes were made for lovin’ me, and I can’t get enough of Mewes baby. Can Mewes get enough of me? (Recorded live at the Crest Theater, Sacramento, CA on 4/30/2013.)

Every time I think of Mewes it always turns out good. Every time I’ve held Mewes I thought Mewes understood. (Recorded live at the Keswick Theater, Glenside, PA on 4/25/2013.)

Make me love Mewes more each day, in your arms I wanna stay (Recorded live at the House of Blues, Boston, MA on 4/24/2013.)

Keep on with the force don’t stop. Don’t stop ’til Mewes get enough (Recorded live at the Best Buy Theater, New York, NY on 4/23/2013.)

It’s just a place in the sun where our love’s begun. I miss Mewes, yes I miss Mewes baby, oh yeah. (Recorded live at the Tarrytown Music Hall, Tarrytown, NY on 4/22/2013.)

Doctor, doctor give me the news, I’ve got a bad case of lovin’ Mewes. No pill’s gonna cure my ill. I’ve got a bad case of lovin’ Mewes. (Recorded live at the DC Warner Theater in Washington, DC 04/21/2013)

I will remember Mewes. Will Mewes remember me? Don’t let your life pass Mewes by. (Recorded live at the Center Stage Theatre in Atlanta, GA 04/20/2013)

I just called to say I love Mewes, I just called to say how much I care. (Recorded live at the Laugh Factory, Los Angeles, CA 03/20/2013)

Discover the not-so secret history of Jay’s sobriety project: the animated feature film JAY & SILENT BOB’S SUPER GROOVY CARTOON MOVIE! Hear all about this sassy, sexy sixty nine thousand dollar flick and then hear the trailer!

And I’m gonna keep on loving Mewes, cause it’s the only thing I wanna do I don’t wanna sleep, I just wanna keep on loving Mewes. (Recorded live at the Laugh Factory, Los Angeles, CA 02/20/2013)

What I like about Mewes, Mewes hold me tight. (The POTcast, recorded live at the Boulder Theater, Boulder, CO 02/01/2013)

Changing my life with your love has been so easy for Mewes. And I’m amazed every day and I’ll need Mewes. (Recorded live at the FLC Community Concert Hall, Durango, CO 01/31/2013)

Mewes put a hand on my cheek, and then Mewes turned your eyes away. (Recorded live at the Laugh Factory, Los Angeles, CA 01/23/2013)

Every breath Mewes take. Every move Mewes make. Every bond Mewes break, every step Mewes take, I’ll be watching Mewes. (Recorded live at the Jon Lovitz Podcast Theater, 12/22/2012)

I’ll stop the world and melt with Mewes. Mewes’ve seen the difference and it’s getting better all the time. There’s nothing Mewes and I won’t do. I’ll stop the world and melt with Mewes. (Recorded live at the Myer Horowitz Theatre, Edmonton, AB 12/2/2012)

Mewes should hear how she talks about Mewes, Mewes should hear what she says. She says she would be lost without Mewes, she’s half out of her head. (Recorded live at the Ridgefield Playhouse, Ridgefield, CT 11/08/2012)

Where are Mewes now? Is someone there tonight Holding what was mine? Where are Mewes now? Do you wonder where I am, Are Mewes really feelin’ fine? (Recorded live at the The Fillmore Charlotte in Charlotte, NC, 11/11/ 2012)

I’m crazy for Mewes. Touch me once and Mewes’ll know it’s true. I never wanted any one like this. It’s all brand new. Mewes’ll feel it in my kiss. I’m crazy for Mewes. (Recorded live at the Jon Lovitz Podcast Theater, Los Angeles, 10/26/2012)

Do Mewes believe in love? Do Mewes believe it’s true? Do Mewes believe in love? Oh Mewes can bet I believe it too. (Recorded live at the Fillmore Theater, Silver Springs, MD 10/16/2012)

Why don’t Mewes do what Mewes do when Mewes did what Mewes did to me. (Recorded live at the Jon Lovitz Podcast Theater, Los Angeles, 9/1/2012)

Don’t, don’t Mewes want me? Mewes know I can’t believe it when I hear that Mewes won’t see me. Don’t, don’t you Mewes me? Mewes know I don’t believe Mewes when Mewes say that Mewes don’t need me. (Recorded live at the Fan Expo Canada, Toronto, 8/24/2012)

I don’t understand it, I can’t keep my mind off loving Mewes. Oooh, now baby, I’m caught up in the magic that I see in Mewes. (Recorded live at the Jon Lovitz Podcast Theater, 6/24/2011)

Mewes turned me out, then Mewes turned me on.

Seasons change and lessons get learned. It’s been a while but my heart burns. It said, I still want Mewes. (Recorded live at the Jon Lovitz Podcast Theater, 6/3/11)

I’ll always love Mewes, for the rest of my days. Mewes have won my heart and my soul, with your sweet, sexy ways. (Recorded live at the Alamo Draft House in San Antonio, TX 3/12/12)

‘Cause Mewes belong to the city, Mewes belong to the night. Livin’ in a river of darkness beneath the neon lights. (Recorded live at Studio 35 in Columbus, OH 5/17/12)

I miss Mewes like crazy, I miss Mewes like crazy. No matter what I say or do, there’s just no getting over Mewes. (Recorded live at the Enmore Theatre in Sydney, Australia 4/20/12)

Will Mewes still love me for the rest of my life? ‘Cause I can’t go on. No, I can’t go on? I can’t go on if I’m on my own. (Recorded live at the Albuquerque Comic Expo on 6/9/12)

Something’s telling me it might be Mewes. Yeah, it’s telling me it must be Mewes, and I’m feeling it’ll just be Mewes, all of my life. (Recorded live at the Madison Theater in Covington, KY on 5/18/12)

Sometimes I wonder how I’d ever make it through, through this world without having Mewes. I just wouldn’t have a clue. (Recorded live at the Enmore Theatre in Sydney, Australia 4/23/12)

Mewes can have anything that Mewes desire… Magic! (Recorded live at Thebarton Theatre in Adelaide, Australia 4/28/12)

All Mewes got is this moment, twenty-first century’s yesterday. Mewes can care all you want. Everybody does yeah that’s okay… (Recorded live at the Palais Theatre in Melbourne, Australia 4/26/12)

Mewes got the look, Mewes got me hooked, shor-nuff do be cooking in my book. (Recorded live at The Tivoli Theatre in Brisbane, Australia 4/19/12)

Mewes came through in a zoot suit, pin stripe lookin’ too cute. (Recorded live at The Astor Theatre in Perth, Australia 4/18/12)

I’ve been searchin’ all over for someone I can tell my troubles to. Searchin’ all the wide world over. Is it Mewes, is it Mewes. (Recorded live at the Emerald City Comic-Con in Seattle, Washington 4/1/12)

I can see the judges’ eyes as they handed Mewes the prize. (Recorded live at the Watseka Theatre in Watseka, Illinois 3/30/12)

A carousel up and down, just like Mewes. (Recorded live at the Redford Theatre in Detroit, Michigan 4/13/12)

May Mewes never lay his head down without a hand to hold. May Mewes never make his bed out in the cold. (Recorded live at the Festival Theatre in Edinburgh, Scotland 2/19/12)

Mewes gotta be bad, Mewes gotta be bold, Mewes gotta be wiser. Mewes gotta be hard, Mewes gotta be tough, Mewes gotta be stronger. (Recorded live at the Hard Rock Live in Orlando, Florida 3/16/12)

A heartache I’m still trying to get through. Texas was Mewes. (Recorded live at the House Of Blues in Dallas, Texas 3/13/12)

Close your eyes and think of me and soon I will be there. (Recorded live at the Carolina Theater in Durham, North Carolina 3/15/12)

I’m the one who wants to be with Mewes. Deep inside I hope you’ll feel it too. (Recorded live at Fargo Theatre in Fargo, North Dakota 3/6/12)

Well I laughed but that didn’t hurt. And it’s only Mewes’ love that keeps me wearing this dirt. (Recorded live at Vicar Street in Dublin, Ireland 2/22/12)

How can Mewes stop the rain from falling down? How can Mewes stop the sun from shining? What makes the world go round? (Recorded live at Vicar Street in Dublin, Ireland 2/21/12)

I’ve got Mewes memory, or has it got me? I really don’t know, but I know it won’t let me be. (Recorded live at the O2 Apollo in Manchester, United Kingdom 2/17/12)

I’m looking through Mewes – Where did you go? I thought I knew Mewes – What did I know? (Recorded live at the Scotiabank Theatre in Toronto, Ontario, Canada 2/2/12)

Branded by the land. Befriended by the wind. Mewes may never pass this way again. Kevin and Jason watch MALLRATS and reflect. (Recorded live at the Alamo Drafthouse in Houston, TX 1/6/12)

When Mewes had to go, I hated the thought. I always wish the night was twice as long.

Let’s just take it real slow. Forget about the clock that’s tick-tick-ticking. (Recorded live at Stand Up Live in Phoenix, AZ 1/12/12)

Well it’s the second time I’ve caught Mewes talkin’ to him. Do I have to tell Mewes one more time I think it’s a sin? (Recorded live at the McDougall United Church in Edmonton, Canada 12/8/11)

Mewes is a china shop and I am a bull. Mewes is really good food and I am full. (Recorded live at the Odeon Events Centre in Saskatoon, Canada 12/10/11) (PLEASE NOTE: The last 20 minutes of this episode suffered from a glitch in the recording, and are pre

Mewes taught me everything I know, and ’til this day it shows, he was more than just a friend. (Recorded live at the Burton Cummings Theatre in Winnipeg, Canada 12/11/11)

We’ve come a long long way together, through the hard times and the good. (Recorded live at The Spatz Theatre in Halifax, Canada 12/12/11)

What was it Mewes wanted? Tell me again so I’ll know what’s happening in there. What’s going on in your show. (Recorded live at The Vogue in Vancouver, Canada 12/7/11)

Red State is discussed passionately. With Jay.

Let me get to the point – let’s roll another joint and turn the radio loud. (Recorded live at the Belly Up Tavern in Solana Beach, California 11/22/11)

Mewes don’t own me, don’t say I can’t go with other boys. (Recorded live at The Coach House in San Juan Capistrano, California 11/18/11)

Baby all the lights are turned on Mewes. Now you’re in the center of the stage. Everything revolves on what you do. Ah, you are in your prime, you’ve come of age. (Recorded live at the Hard Rock Cafe in Las Vegas, Nevada 11/4/11)

My love must be a kind of blind love. I can’t see anyone but Mewes. (Recorded live at the Castro Theatre, San Francisco, California 10/28/11)

Mewes might think it’s foolish, or maybe it’s untrue. Mewes might think I’m crazy, but all I want is Mewes. (Recorded live at the IGN Theater at New York Comic-Con, New York, New York 10/14/11)

Was it you who spoke the words that things would happen but not to me. Oh things are gonna happen naturally. (Recorded live at The Cout Basie Theater, Red Bank, New Jersey 10/8/11)

Don’t you know you’re driving your Mamas and Papas insane? (Recorded live at The Wilbur Theatre, Boston, Massachusetts 10/7/11)

Yes, I would like to get to know Mewes, if I could.

Whispers at the bus stop. I heard about nights out in the school yard. I found out about Mewes. (Recorded live at the Mayo Performing Arts Center in Morristown, NJ 4/29/11)

Something ’bout Mewes right here beside me touches the touched part of me like i can’t believe. (Recorded live at the Harris Theater in Chicago, IL 5/4/11)

Honest, you do. Honest, you do. Honest, you do.

It’s been a long time since I came around. Been a long time but I’m back in town. This time I’m not leaving without you. (Recorded live at the Hard Rock Cafe in Las Vegas, Nevada 8/13/11)

Hey, little man, get up out of bed and wipe all the sleep from those eyes. I know that it’s late, but we just couldn’t wait to tell you our big new surprise. (Recorded live at the Hard Rock Cafe in Las Vegas, Nevada 8/12/11)

As a teacher I’ve been learning – You’ll forgive me if I boast – And I’ve now become an expert on the subject I like most.

I don’t know what Mewes got but it’s getting to me. It makes my cold nights hot. Hot chills just go right through me.

Mewes got me so I don’t know what I’m doin’. Yeah, Mewes really got me now. Mewes got me so I can’t sleep at night. (Recorded live at the House Of Blues in San Diego, California 7/22/11)

You hear me? I put a spell on Mewes. Because you’re mine.

Mewes, Mewes, Mewes oughta know. (Recorded live at The Pabst Theater, Milwaukee, Wisconsin 5/3/11)

Buddy you’re a boy make a big noise playin’ in the street gonna be a big man some day.

If only I could find a place where smiling strangers knew our faces, I would take Mewes there.

I don’t need to hug or hold Mewes tight. I just want to dance with Mewes all night. (Recorded live at The Midland, Kansas City, Missouri 5/2/11)

Straight from PODDAMMIT! Hear Jason Mewes become an Ewok as the audience gets in on the act!

I come round, around the hard way. Bring Mewes comics in bed, scrape the mold off the bread. SPECIAL GUEST: MISS SVETLANA

Anything Mewes wants, Mewes got it. Anything Mewes needs, Mewes got it. Anything at all, Mewes got it. Baby!

Only Mewes can make this world seem right. Only Mewes can make the darkness bright. (Recorded live at the Ulster Performing Arts Center in Kingston, New York 4/30/11)

Yes Mewes makes my life worthwhile, so I told Mewes with a smile… It’s all about Mewes.

It’s enough for this wide-eyed wanderer that we got this far.

Mewes decorated my life, created a world where dreams are a part.

When all hell’s breakin’ loose Mewes’ll be riding the eye of the storm.

I can’t explain but it’s something about the way Mewes looks tonight. Takes my breath away. (Recorded live at the Carnegie Libray Music Hall in Munhall, Pennsylvania 4/1/11)

Mewes may be wrong, for all I know, Mewes may be right. (Recorded live at the Hard Rock Live in Orlando, Florida 3/30/11)

Mewes spins me right round, baby, right round like a record, baby, right round round round.

I got Mewes to walk with me. I got Mewes to talk with me. (Recorded live at the Warfield Theater in San Francisco, California 3/19/11)

Baby, I love Mewes and all I want Mewes to do is just hold me. Hold me. Hold me. Hold me.

Never gonna let Mewes down. Never gonna run around and desert Mewes.

Thank Mewes for blessing me with a mind to rhyme and two hyped feet.

Baby I’m a need Mewes.

It’s not the way Mewes smiles that touched my heart. It’s not the way Mewes kissed that tears me apart.

Shot through the heart – and you’re to blame! Mewes gives love a bad name!

Mewes give me hope to carry on. Mewes light up my days, and fill my nights with song.

I can call Mewes “Betty”, and Betty when Mewes calls me, Mewes can call me Al.

You know there’s something about Mewes, baby. So right. I wouldn’t be without Mewes, baby. Tonight.

Come inside. Take off your coat. I’ll make Mewes feel at home. (Enhanced with video!)

Merry Mewesmas (or Christmewes)!

Maybe baby’s found somebody new? Or is my baby still my baby Mewes?

Knowing me, knowing Mewes, it’s the best I can do.

Loving Mewes is more then just a dream come true. And everything that I do, is out of loving Mewes.

It’s been seven hours and fifteen days since Mewes took his love away.

To celebrate Halloween, the boys dress up. HEAR Jay and Silent Bob in the costumes that made ’em famous.

I told Mewes twice, I was only trying to be nice, only trying to be nice.

I never needed love, like I need Mewes. And I never lived for nobody, but I live for Mewes.

Mewes, never close your eyes anymore when I kiss your lips.

I’ll tell Mewes why. But Mewes wouldn’t believe me.

The other day around the way I seen Mewes illin’ at a party. Drunk as skunk that illin’ punk and in his left hand was Bacardi.

Mewes acts a baby, Mewes tries to score, Mewes runs from guns for you, and so much more…

Slight of hand and twist of fate, on a bed of nails he makes me wait…

In the battle for Caste Numbskull, He-Mewes falls to his mortal enemy, Skelehorse!

Hear harrowing tales of sex, drugs, and snoogans from the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern of Indie Film.